Hello-
I have a question about my boyfriend and Christmas. This will be our second Christmas together. Last year, he got me a lot of nice things, which was great! I got him a really expensive sweater and a CD. He liked them both but I really couldn’t afford what I bought. This year, I’m facing the same problem. He makes twice the money I do. I want to be able to buy him more but I just can’t afford it. What do I do?
Sweetie. This isn’t a problem but I understand why you feel like it is. It’s okay that you can’t afford to purchase the same amount of gifts/spend the same amount on him as he can spend on you. If you’re uncomfortable with him spending more, set a limit for which each of you adhere. Or you can simply have a conversation with him explaining your feelings and going from there. Be honest with him and communicate. It’s not about the gifts at Christmas, it’s about being together and being thankful that’s the most important thing to remember.
Wishing You the Best-
Maggie
Friday, December 19, 2008
Friday, December 12, 2008
Stay of My Bushes!
Dear Maggie
I have a neighbor who is always chopping my bushes. I understand if they grow over my fence that he can cut them. But I don’t understand why he leans over the fence and cuts what is on my side. I don’t know him and I’m not sure what to do.
Help!
Interesting dilemma. As far as I’m concerned, if he’s leaning over the fence, he’s on your property. And last I checked most cities have rules against fooling with your neighbors’ property, regardless of their reason. Now, how you handle this is crucial because let’s face it….you can’t pick your neighbors and for your own health, you should have a peaceful existence.
Perhaps introducing yourself is a good first step. Make a batch of cookies or banana bread and take it over. While you’re there, you could mention that you’ve noticed he’s had to do a lot of work to keep your bushes out of his yard. Offer to help him with the work or to trim more often. Be nice, you will get more flies with honey.
Good luck-
Wishing You the Best-Maggie
I have a neighbor who is always chopping my bushes. I understand if they grow over my fence that he can cut them. But I don’t understand why he leans over the fence and cuts what is on my side. I don’t know him and I’m not sure what to do.
Help!
Interesting dilemma. As far as I’m concerned, if he’s leaning over the fence, he’s on your property. And last I checked most cities have rules against fooling with your neighbors’ property, regardless of their reason. Now, how you handle this is crucial because let’s face it….you can’t pick your neighbors and for your own health, you should have a peaceful existence.
Perhaps introducing yourself is a good first step. Make a batch of cookies or banana bread and take it over. While you’re there, you could mention that you’ve noticed he’s had to do a lot of work to keep your bushes out of his yard. Offer to help him with the work or to trim more often. Be nice, you will get more flies with honey.
Good luck-
Wishing You the Best-Maggie
Friday, December 5, 2008
Don't Be Rude
Dear Maggie;
Is it rude to not purchase a baby shower gift when you life 1500 miles away and really aren't that close to the person who sent you the baby shower invitation?
Let me see here. She sent you an invitation, even though you aren't close and clearly aren't going to come 1500 miles to the shower?
I don't know what any of the etiquette experts would say but my opinion is chuck the invite. Send a gift if you want but if you don't want to, don't. You're not obligated to send gifts. Personally it sounds like that was the only reason you got an invitation to begin with. Bad form on her part.
Wishing you the Best-
Maggie
Is it rude to not purchase a baby shower gift when you life 1500 miles away and really aren't that close to the person who sent you the baby shower invitation?
Let me see here. She sent you an invitation, even though you aren't close and clearly aren't going to come 1500 miles to the shower?
I don't know what any of the etiquette experts would say but my opinion is chuck the invite. Send a gift if you want but if you don't want to, don't. You're not obligated to send gifts. Personally it sounds like that was the only reason you got an invitation to begin with. Bad form on her part.
Wishing you the Best-
Maggie
Friday, November 14, 2008
Quiet Already!
Maggie;
There is a lady I work with that gossips constantly. I can't concentrate, it's gotten so bad. I can't even believe half the stuff she says. As soon as anyone in the office leaves, she starts talking about them! How do I get her to stop?
I despise gossips and I make it very clear that I do not want to hear nor will I be a part of gossip. I rarely have anyone come to me with gossip anymore. You teach people what they can and cannot say to you by your reaction to them. Walk away. Or tell her you don't want to hear it. If she isn't speaking to you but disturbing you, it would be appropriate to pull her off to the side and ask her to lower her voice when she is speaking to others. If she doesn't respect your wished, I would go to your boss. Gossip is immature and ridiculous. No one should have room for gossip in their lives.
Wishing You the Best-
Maggie
There is a lady I work with that gossips constantly. I can't concentrate, it's gotten so bad. I can't even believe half the stuff she says. As soon as anyone in the office leaves, she starts talking about them! How do I get her to stop?
I despise gossips and I make it very clear that I do not want to hear nor will I be a part of gossip. I rarely have anyone come to me with gossip anymore. You teach people what they can and cannot say to you by your reaction to them. Walk away. Or tell her you don't want to hear it. If she isn't speaking to you but disturbing you, it would be appropriate to pull her off to the side and ask her to lower her voice when she is speaking to others. If she doesn't respect your wished, I would go to your boss. Gossip is immature and ridiculous. No one should have room for gossip in their lives.
Wishing You the Best-
Maggie
Monday, October 27, 2008
CYA
Maggie-
My boss is stealing from our company. I am the business manager and I’ve discovered some very incriminating evidence to corroborate my findings. Trouble is...what if they don’t believe me even with the evidence and I am the one who gets canned? I can’t afford to take a lot of chances in this economy. Maybe I should just ignore the facts? Can I get fired for that too?
Thank you-Mary Ellen
Mary Ellen;
This is a serious matter. I am not an HR aficionado but I can tell you right now, you would indeed get in trouble for not telling the truth-or rather not telling all of the truth. Boss or no boss-it's time for you to cover your own fanny. You need to go speak to the head of Human Resources for direction and go from there. You MUST say something, or you indeed will lose your job...and your chance for a reference from this company!
Wishing You the Best-
Maggie
My boss is stealing from our company. I am the business manager and I’ve discovered some very incriminating evidence to corroborate my findings. Trouble is...what if they don’t believe me even with the evidence and I am the one who gets canned? I can’t afford to take a lot of chances in this economy. Maybe I should just ignore the facts? Can I get fired for that too?
Thank you-Mary Ellen
Mary Ellen;
This is a serious matter. I am not an HR aficionado but I can tell you right now, you would indeed get in trouble for not telling the truth-or rather not telling all of the truth. Boss or no boss-it's time for you to cover your own fanny. You need to go speak to the head of Human Resources for direction and go from there. You MUST say something, or you indeed will lose your job...and your chance for a reference from this company!
Wishing You the Best-
Maggie
Monday, October 13, 2008
5 Fingered Discounts
Maggie My question is about my brother. He’s 14 and I’ll be 12 next week. We get along for the most part. My parents have been fighting a lot lately and Dad moved out right before school started. Mom won’t let us go stay there but we see him on the weekend. Anyway, since the whole thing with my Mom and Dad has been going on, my brother has been acting like a real jerk. Stealing stuff and everything. Then he just throws it away later or sells it to his friends. He isn’t the same any more, I know he’s mad at Mom for kicking Dad out but I don’t get why he is stealing. He told me last time if I told on him, he would beat the crap out of me and I know he would. I don’t want to get beat up. But I don’t want to get caught with him.
Thanks for writing me, it sounds like you are in a tough spot. The first thing I am going to say to you is Happy Birthday, you only turn 12 once so enjoy it! Secondly, I'm sorry about your folks, my folks got divorced when I was a kid and I know for me it wasn't easy. I think you are right, your brother is probably PO'd...I know I would be and he's just doing mean stuff right now. You need to do what's right, in the end, he'll thank you for it. That means bringing an adult into this situation.
I highly recommend talking to your councelor about your parents and the situation with your brother. He/she will guide you as to the next steps. Good luck and keep your head up, it's bound to get better.
Wishing you the Best-
Maggie
Thanks for writing me, it sounds like you are in a tough spot. The first thing I am going to say to you is Happy Birthday, you only turn 12 once so enjoy it! Secondly, I'm sorry about your folks, my folks got divorced when I was a kid and I know for me it wasn't easy. I think you are right, your brother is probably PO'd...I know I would be and he's just doing mean stuff right now. You need to do what's right, in the end, he'll thank you for it. That means bringing an adult into this situation.
I highly recommend talking to your councelor about your parents and the situation with your brother. He/she will guide you as to the next steps. Good luck and keep your head up, it's bound to get better.
Wishing you the Best-
Maggie
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Does He Love Me....
Dear Maggie,
I have a guy friend, but I'm not sure if he likes me?My friends say he likes me because he is quite flirty with me, like putting his arm around me and holding hands, but I don't think he's serious. Since we have the same last name we kinda joke that we're brother and sister, so one day he started poking me (in a joking way) and saying this is for being sister, this is for being my biological sister. So I don't really think he likes me. One time my other guy friend who sits with him at lunch was showing me some pictures, then he (the one I'm not sure of) was like oh good you didn't get the picture of me and this other girl hugging, since I saw a picture of him with his arm around this other girl or something like that. So um... yeah, I think he's just joking with me but my friends think he's serious. Oh, and I know the other girl was his ex or something like that, but he told me he broke up with her before so yeah.
I’m guessing you’re under the age of 20…please email me back if I’m wrong on that one. If that is true, then your friends are probably right, he probably does like you. How do I know? Guys are not really good with saying how they feel at any age but certainly not at that age. So they will find ways to touch and flirt with you that don’t really put them out on a limb to be rejected.
I’m a direct kinda gal and I would be inclined to simply say, “Hey, you know, I usually only let guys hold my hands if they plan to be more than friends” and give him a big smile. I think he might joke back but he’ll make his feelings known soon after if he’s serious.
Wish you the Best-
Maggie
I have a guy friend, but I'm not sure if he likes me?My friends say he likes me because he is quite flirty with me, like putting his arm around me and holding hands, but I don't think he's serious. Since we have the same last name we kinda joke that we're brother and sister, so one day he started poking me (in a joking way) and saying this is for being sister, this is for being my biological sister. So I don't really think he likes me. One time my other guy friend who sits with him at lunch was showing me some pictures, then he (the one I'm not sure of) was like oh good you didn't get the picture of me and this other girl hugging, since I saw a picture of him with his arm around this other girl or something like that. So um... yeah, I think he's just joking with me but my friends think he's serious. Oh, and I know the other girl was his ex or something like that, but he told me he broke up with her before so yeah.
I’m guessing you’re under the age of 20…please email me back if I’m wrong on that one. If that is true, then your friends are probably right, he probably does like you. How do I know? Guys are not really good with saying how they feel at any age but certainly not at that age. So they will find ways to touch and flirt with you that don’t really put them out on a limb to be rejected.
I’m a direct kinda gal and I would be inclined to simply say, “Hey, you know, I usually only let guys hold my hands if they plan to be more than friends” and give him a big smile. I think he might joke back but he’ll make his feelings known soon after if he’s serious.
Wish you the Best-
Maggie
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